Expressionless

my heart's not clawing at it's cage anymore
nothing remains of you, except the thought
it just sits right there in the back of my mind
expressionless, staring me down

trying to peel itself from the floor
before the moss grows on the rocks
holding it down, the weight's almost too much
still, it's expressionless, and staring me down

if i shed the weight of it
will i feel its hand keep me under?
if the current pulls it away
will i hold my breath or let it happen?

i'm conflicted, i'm confused
this is not the normal i assumed that i'd return to

my lungs try to make room
this stagnant water lingered long enough
this is how progression works, right?
expressionless, i cough it up

if i shed the weight of it
will i feel its hand keep me under?
if the current drags it away
will i go with it or let it happen?

i'm conflicted, i'm confused
this is not the normal i assumed that i'd return to
this admission, such relief
i realize that in good time i will find the truth

if it's in the mirror, i'll search forever
if it's in the distance, i'll live and let be